The dark, open water, and wind: Three of my greatest fears.
So how is it that I am also a sailor?
My husband must have been a pirate in a previous life, because he all but *forced* me to take up sailing. To say I was a nervous student is an understatement. The terminology was all new, being in a slow moving boat seemed to serve no purpose, and my fears gripped me so tightly.
But EVERY trip has borne a great story, and the tales do get better in the telling:
– The picture perfect downwind sail into an equally picture perfect bay;
– Learning the all important phrase “Ease the Main!” well heeled with a novice crew;
– The time I cried real tears just outside the marina in a real small boat in real gale force winds;
– Even the time I fell overboard in the pitch dark on my “honeymoon”.
Despite my fears (and the adventures described above!), the promise of an interesting story gets me back on board every time.
So my husband captains the ship, while I take the helm… and fret.
“If something happens to you, we’re screwed!” I keep telling him.
This year, he responded, “No. You are just missing the radio course and you could captain a charter boat on your own. You could manage.”
Say WHAT, now? The only experience I’m missing is another classroom course?
I had believed I was destined be mere crew, that he had some magical extra credentials, and that the “First Mate” hat was a joke!
While it’s not presently on my bucket list to captain any boat, the awareness that my skills are objectively sufficient to “go it alone” has changed my perspective about what is possible. Maybe I CAN stay at the helm when the wind picks up. Maybe I CAN back into that slip. Maybe I CAN set the anchor.
It’s as if a door that I thought was locked is now wide open.
What doors do you believe are locked? Are they? If they are opened to you, will you let your fears hold you back?
Photo: Active Pass, British Columbia, Canada, July 2020, shortly before things got too “exciting” for me to feel comfortable at the helm.
